After 40 years as a computer programmer and game developer—and the passing of his wife of 47 years—Rick has retired and is now living in Ye Olde Folks Home, where he still tinkers with tech and likes to write these amusing and/or thoughtful tales about his storied life.

The Eggshell Incident
First Chapel Service at Ye Olde Folks Home
A Yearly Ritual at Menards
“Mr. Loftus, the Town Hero”
The FCAL Project
Pepe Le Pew Finds New Lodgings
In Memoriam: Dale Lear
Bingo Bedlam at Ye Olde Folks Home
There’s a Shortage of Perfect Movies…
One Day at the DMV
A Visitor from Microsoft
“He Who Should Not Be Named”
Downton… Abbey?
This Home is a Liver-Free Zone
My 9/11 Rememberances
My Yearly Pumpkin Spice Rant
Done In By Baker’s Square
My Eulogy for Alice
“Dear Rikki…”
A Clean, Well-lighted Place for Books
Memories of my First Computer
A Little Excitement at the Staff Meeting
The Tale of Mrs. Butler
Sun, Sand, and a Margarita
“Thou Shalt Not Steal”
Troubleshooting at Ye Olde Folks Home
Stories of my Mother
I’ve Heard Angels Sing
Elevator Mishap at the Eye Clinic
One Day at Fair, Isaac
Saturday Morning Cartoons
A Sprig of Parsley
Fun With Recruitment Ads
Leave Her to Heaven
“Squirrel!”
Bring me Dave Bringle!
Beware! The Oldsters Are Coming!
Life Among the Progressives
A Family Ritual While Watching Masterpiece
The Unforgettable General Oppy
“Don’t Even THINK About Parking Here”
A Dubious Plan Gone Awry
The Singing Christmas Tree!
One Day in the Hospital Lab
The Legend of the Broken Timer
Nelson’s Fruit Stand
This One Time in Glee Club…
Star Trek References for the Win
Family Psalm, Stuck in Lodi
Vacation in Branson
Clyde and Ruth Revisited
COVID Policies During my Wife’s Fatal Illness
I Guess I’m the Shadow IT Department Now
The Tale of Clyde and Ruth
My Garden of Gethsemane Story
We Might Get a Virus!

First Chapel Service at Ye Olde Folks Home

This was written back in 2021, when I had just moved into Ye Olde Folks Home and we were still dealing with the pandemic.

Once upon a time I was on the committee to choose a new logo for a church. It was… interesting, to say the least.

All the submitted logos that included a cross got rejected right off the bat. According to research and focus groups, we were told, men are turned off by crosses. Women don’t mind them, but, “Women already come to church, men not so much.”

If it is true that more women than men attend church, and women live on average 8% longer than men, what does that imply about the attendance at a chapel service in a senior facility?

I attended chapel for the first time at our complex today and I can tell you that the attendees were 98% octogenarian women, all entering the room with a regal bearing despite their walkers and wheelchairs.

I felt like I was in the presence of royalty, except perhaps I should say a royal family, who joshed each other around with lighthearted sass, giggling and teasing as they called out to each other by name.

“Grape juice?” One teased the chaplain as he prepared communion, then pouted, “Why can’t we have wine?”

“I wonder if I could get away with that,” the chaplain mused, his eyes twinkling above his mask.

Yes, we followed protocol with everyone wearing their masks as we sang the old hymns and took communion. I know for a fact a lot of those ladies were in their church choirs back in their day, because I heard a lot of solid harmonies and a few of those show-off sopranos.

The homily was on “finishing the race well,” only in a room of octogenarians that takes on an unexpectedly somber meaning. The chaplain stressed Bible reading, prayer, and making out an advance life directive.

Well. That escalated quickly.

Oh, I forgot the best part! Afterwards, I noticed that I had attended wearing a black tshirt with a skull and crossbones on the front. I bet that was a first!