After 40 years as a computer programmer and game developer—and the passing of his wife of 47 years—Rick has retired and is now living in Ye Olde Folks Home, where he still tinkers with tech and likes to write these amusing and/or thoughtful tales about his storied life.

Bringing Coffee for Alice
“Turn Off the Lights!”
What to Say to the Grieving
While Waiting for the School Bus
An Unfortunate Misunderstanding
In Memoriam: Betty Lou Edwards-Vessel
A Little Knowledge is a Dangerous Thing
Who Would Jesus Stab?
The Eggshell Incident
First Chapel Service at Ye Olde Folks Home
A Yearly Ritual at Menards
“Mr. Loftus, the Town Hero”
The FCAL Project
Pepe Le Pew Finds New Lodgings
In Memoriam: Dale Lear
Bingo Bedlam at Ye Olde Folks Home
There’s a Shortage of Perfect Movies…
One Day at the DMV
A Visitor from Microsoft
“He Who Should Not Be Named”
Downton… Abbey?
This Home is a Liver-Free Zone
My 9/11 Rememberances
My Yearly Pumpkin Spice Rant
Done In By Baker’s Square
My Eulogy for Alice
“Dear Rikki…”
A Clean, Well-lighted Place for Books
Memories of my First Computer
A Little Excitement at the Staff Meeting
The Tale of Mrs. Butler
Sun, Sand, and a Margarita
“Thou Shalt Not Steal”
Troubleshooting at Ye Olde Folks Home
Stories of my Mother
I’ve Heard Angels Sing
Elevator Mishap at the Eye Clinic
One Day at Fair, Isaac
Saturday Morning Cartoons
A Sprig of Parsley
Fun With Recruitment Ads
Leave Her to Heaven
“Squirrel!”
Bring me Dave Bringle!
Beware! The Oldsters Are Coming!
Life Among the Progressives
A Family Ritual While Watching Masterpiece
The Unforgettable General Oppy
“Don’t Even THINK About Parking Here”
A Dubious Plan Gone Awry
The Singing Christmas Tree!
One Day in the Hospital Lab
The Legend of the Broken Timer
Nelson’s Fruit Stand
This One Time in Glee Club…
Star Trek References for the Win
Family Psalm, Stuck in Lodi
Vacation in Branson
Clyde and Ruth Revisited
COVID Policies During my Wife’s Fatal Illness
I Guess I’m the Shadow IT Department Now
The Tale of Clyde and Ruth
My Garden of Gethsemane Story
We Might Get a Virus!

Bringing Coffee for Alice

This was written around three months before Alice’s passing.

I ran an errand of mercy for Alice yesterday morning: bring coffee! She refuses to drink the hospital coffee; she says it tastes nasty. So I filled up a thermos cup for her, set it in the cupholder in my car, and off I went!

Sitting in a long line of cars at a red light, suddenly the car lurched with a mighty thump!

“Not todaaay!” I cried out in frustration.

I got out of the car and sure enough, the lady behind me had hit my car from behind. She was profusely apologetic. “My foot just slipped off the brake for a second!” she said.

I have bad news to report. Alice’s coffee had tipped over and spilled.

What’s that? What about the car, you ask?

Well, you aren’t going to believe this, but my car was completely unharmed; not even a scratch.

Both the manically apologizing lady and myself were considerably relieved, although she seemed a bit bemused by my jumping up and down shouting, “Praise God! Hallelujah!”

Despite the spillage, there was still plenty left for a hot cup of Costa Rican coffee, which Alice gulped down happily.

Her dietician is concerned that she isn’t eating enough, so she asked me to bring in a low sodium meal from Alice’s favorite restaurant for dinner.

Well, Alice’s favorite restaurant is Red Lobster, which seasons their food with salt by the bucketful, so good luck with that, but on the order I added the note, “Make as low sodium as possible.”

And so last night Alice and I had a date night! (“…in the hospital,” she said dryly. “How romantic.”) She absolutely loved her broiled rainbow trout, rice, and green bean dinner and ate most of it.

She eyed my dinner—shrimp skewers—enviously, but I didn’t order that for her for fear it’d be too salty, but it wasn’t. So I’ll get her that next time.